Author Archives: adguru101

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About adguru101

Formerly a creative director and writer at NY and NJ ad agencies, I'm now retired and living in Oregon, USA, with my husband and countless dust balls. With this blog, I specifically hope to reach "mid-century moderns" -- women born in the '50's -- with content and observations about the issues we deal with every day. But I welcome all readers of any age, sex, orientation, etc… you youngsters will eventually be my age too, and I love reading everyone’s comments!

Random Household Hacks

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A New Year’s Resolution: I will search for answers to life’s pesky little problems and share my finds with all of you.

#1:  How to open a stubborn jar lid

Let’s assume that brute strength has not done the trick.  Here are some options:

1) Improve your grip

  • Put plastic wrap over the lid and twist.
  • Place a rubber band around the lid and twist.
  • Put on a rubber glove and twist.  (Anyone else reminded of Chubby Checker??)

2) Tap around the edge of the cap with a wooden spoon.  This should release the air pockets of the vacuum seal. It’s also less likely to shatter the jar than banging it on your countertop.

3) Still stuck?  Turn your jar upside down and place in a bowl filled with hot water. After about 30 seconds, the lid should loosen.

4) For sticky stuff (honey, molasses, etc.), plan ahead. Cover the jar opening with plastic wrap before you put the lid back on. (This also helps with paint cans.)

#2 How to quickly chill wine or beer 

Uh oh — unexpected, thirsty guests have arrived! Wrap a damp paper towel around the bottle or cans and place them in the freezer.  They will chill much faster than without the towel. Do not forget they are in the freezer! (Yes, I have done this and then had to clean up the resulting mess.)

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Lipstick On Your Collar?

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Calling all ladies, drag queens, and overly-enthusiastic lovers: If you’ve ever gotten lipstick on your clothes (e.g., on the collar as you pulled a blouse or sweater over your head, or on your sleeve as you brushed your hair) you’ll appreciate the following advice I found online.

After you stop swearing, act quickly and there’s a good chance you can salvage the situation and avoid a permanent stain on your shirt or reputation.

(Adapted from WhoWhatWear)

  1. Remove excess lipstick. Using the smooth edge of a butter knife or credit card, gently scrape off any pieces you can without rubbing more into the fabric. This keeps the stain from spreading.
  2. Blot with alcohol. Dampen a clean cloth or cotton square with isopropyl (“rubbing”) alcohol. Dab gently (don’t rub!); then, rinse the fabric thoroughly with cold water. For delicate or vividly-dyed fabrics, test an inconspicuous area first to make sure the color won’t run.
  3. Apply stain remover if the stain persists. Although eco-friendly stain removers tend to be gentler on fabric, stubborn stains may require a chemical-based product. Either way, check the care label before using a stain remover.
  4. Wash with liquid detergent. Submerge the stained area in warm water and rub gently, using a small amount of liquid detergent. (Note: very hot water can cause the stain to “bleed”.) Once the stain is hard to see, machine washing should be safe.
  5. Another option: hairspray. Spray hairspray directly onto the stain and let it sit for 10 to 15 minutes. Dip a clean cloth in warm water and gently blot the stain. This should remove both the hairspray and the lipstick.

If all else fails, visit your dry cleaner.

A quick Google search reveals that the first use of “dry” cleaning (which is, in fact, a wet process using solvents instead of water) was to get stains out of togas. You’ll be happy to know that modern methods no longer use ammonia derived from urine, which was the ancient Roman method. Ewww.

Today, clothes are loaded into a machine that looks similar to a regular washing machine, and dry-cleaning chemicals are added. One of the most common solvents is tetrachloroethylene, aka perchlorethylene (“perc”), which has fallen out of favor due to health and environmental concerns. As a result, there’s been more widespread demand for biodegradable alternatives such as siloxane.

Finally, here’s a totally random hack I love: To shorten sleeves on a blazer or coat without tailoring, gather the inside sleeve fabric at the elbow and secure with a safety pin. Genius!

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Hair Today, and Other Resolutions

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My new hair stylist says:

“As we get older, our hair should get softer and our clothes more structured.”

Words to live by! Layers of flow-y fabrics can make us look shapeless, while sharply angled, severe or stiff hair styles can be a harsh contrast to a softening jawline.

January brings with it not only the predictable resolutions (eat less, floss more) but also the sobering bills resulting from December splurges on gifts and entertaining.

If you love fashion, January can be a minefield of temptation. Below are 10 ways to trim your fashion budget this (or any) month, no matter your age:

  1. Break the browsing habit. Whether you’re scrolling or strolling, something’s sure to catch your eye. Unless you need a specific item to fill a gap in your wardrobe or replace an old/worn-out/ill-fitting favorite, resist!
  2. Likewise, note inspirational looks on Pinterest, Instagram or in magazines; then bookmark and set aside to see if you’re still obsessed next month.
  3. Don’t buy multiples or duplicates of stuff you already have. Chances are, one of your many black blazers is still your go-to.
  4. Save on tailoring. Yes, it makes everything look better but try to limit yourself to clothes that fit you right now.
  5. Skip the sales. You’ve undoubtedly heard the advice, “If you wouldn’t buy it at full price don’t buy it on sale.” You’ll avoid temptation and shopping regrets.
  6. Put your monthly fashion fix subscription box on hold. If it doesn’t arrive on your doorstep, you won’t crave that new belt, scarf, blouse etc.
  7. Avoid dry-clean-only purchases. They add significantly to the price of an item.
  8. Be careful when ordering from overseas e-tailers. Shipping costs can be significant, especially if you need to return your purchase.
  9. Similarly, don’t order from places without generous return policies and free shipping. That Chanel jacket on RealReal may seem like a bargain, but if it doesn’t fit you’ve just blown real money sending it back.
  10. Space out your beauty appointments. Extending the time between haircuts by 2 weeks (say, every 10 weeks instead of every 8) can save you the cost of two appointments per year.

Happy New Year, dear readers and fellow bloggers! And here’s hoping that 2018 is better than 2017 – a pretty sucky year worldwide.

Cheers, Alisa

 

Delicious Wishes for the Holidays

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To celebrate this season of giving and sharing, I’m passing along an old favorite.  May your holiday and New Year be filled with health, happiness, good cheer and everything you find meaningful. xo, Alisa

Focaccia with olives and rosemary

Bon Appétit |  May 1995

This recipe was inspired by one from olive oil expert Lidia Colavita. You can make a meal around the bread by offering it as an accompaniment to bean soup.

Serves 8.

Ingredients

2 cups warm water (105°F; to 115°F;)
2 teaspoons dry yeast
4 1/2 cups (about) all purpose flour
2 teaspoon salt

3 tablespoons olive oil
24 black or green brine-cured olives (such as Kalamata or Greek),
pitted, halved
1 tablespoon chopped fresh rosemary or 1 1/2 teaspoons dried

Preparation

Place 2 cups warm water in large bowl. Sprinkle dry yeast over; stir with fork. Let stand until yeast dissolves, about 10 minutes.Add 4 1/4 cups flour and salt to yeast mixture and stir to blend well (dough will be sticky). Knead dough on floured surface until smooth and elastic, adding more flour by tablespoonfuls if dough is sticky, about 10 minutes. Form dough into ball. Oil large bowl; add dough, turning to coat. Cover with plastic wrap and let rise in warm area until doubled, about 1 1/2 hours. Punch down dough; knead into ball and return to same bowl. Cover with plastic wrap and let rise in warm area until doubled, about 45 minutes or less

Coat 15×10-inch baking sheet with 1 tablespoon oil. Punch down dough. Transfer to prepared sheet. Using fingertips, press out dough to 13×10-inch rectangle. Let dough rest 10 minutes. Drizzle 2 tablespoons oil over dough. Sprinkle olives and chopped rosemary evenly over. Let dough rise uncovered in warm area until puffy, about 25 minutes.

Preheat oven to 475°F. Press fingertips all over dough, forming indentations. Bake bread until brown and crusty, about 20 minutes. Serve bread warm or at room temperature.

Party Line

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I’ve been noticing a growing trend: hosts and hostesses who weren’t taught the golden rule of party giving – namely, that your role is to make sure that all your guests have a great time. (If you have a good time, too, that’s icing on the birthday cake!)

At several parties we attended this past year, the hosts stayed in the kitchen or one part of the house, chatting with only a few people. They didn’t circulate with an eye out for anyone who might be standing alone. Nor did they make introductions (e.g., “Have you met So-and-So? He’s a pilot and since you love to travel, you should get to know each other”), thereby giving the conversation a starting point.

Is this generational? Geographical? Situational… perhaps a carryover from going to office parties where you already know everyone?

There’s a parallel trend at dinner parties: guests who either show up empty-handed or fail to write a “bread and butter” thank you note (or e-mail or text). Contrast that with friends who came over the other night bringing two bottles of wine, homemade dessert, and flowers. These are people you’ll definitely invite again!

Meanwhile, since you probably have some parties and eating in your future from now through New Year’s, I found the following food cravings chart very interesting. I have no idea whether the science behind it is sound, but if it helps, who cares, right?

Remember that nuts and cheese are high in calories, so substitute in moderation.

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Happy holidays!

A Little Holiday Humor

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(Sent from a friend.)

THERE WERE 3 GOOD ARGUMENTS THAT

Jesus was Black:

  1. He called everyone “brother”.
  2. He liked Gospel.
  3. He didn’t get a fair trial.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:

  1. He went into his Father’s business.
  2. He lived at home until he was 33.
  3. He was sure his mother was a virgin, and his mother was sure He was God.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:

  1. He talked with his hands.
  2. He had wine with his meals.
  3. He used olive oil.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:

  1. He never cut his hair.
  2. He walked around barefoot all the time.
  3. He started a new religion.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Native American:

  1. He was at peace with nature.
  2. He ate a lot of fish.
  3. He talked about the Great Spirit.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:

  1. He never got married.
  2. He was always telling stories.
  3. He loved green pastures.

But the most compelling evidence of all proves that Jesus was a WOMAN:

  1. He fed a crowd at a moment’s notice when there was virtually no food.
  2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn’t get it.
  3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do.

 

#Me Too?

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The world is abuzz with new revelations about sexual harassment, workplace predators and all-around bad behavior.

This leads me to think about a couple of incidents from my past.  Viewed through today’s lens, they’d probably warrant a call to HR.  But — and this is not to excuse these men — the world WAS different when I was young.

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Incident #1

A suburban-dwelling supervisor stopped by my desk one evening to let me know he was going to “apartment sit” a friend’s place in the city for a few days and encouraged me to meet him there for drinks “and”. Said supervisor was married, decades older, and my direct boss.  Accepting might fast-track a promotion and certainly lead to plum assignments; refusal could turn a cordial relationship into enmity.

Unlike, say, Harvey Weinstein, there was no physical intimidation.  But the message was clear: if you want to advance, here’s one way to do it.

Incident #2

I had a tiny office and a very large, very tall boss.  One day, he came in, closed the door, and proceeded to back me up against the wall while attempting to kiss me. Physical and scary, as this man had total power over me — not just in that moment but going forward if I handled things badly.

Did I tell anyone? No. Because what good would it have done? Men had no hesitation coming on to women at work; it was almost expected and it happened a LOT. So with both bosses I tried to offer a reply that would protect their egos while I rejected them –thereby preserving our working relationship.

With boss #1, I flattered him by reminding him that I was a lot younger and said that if we became involved I’d risk falling for him, which would be a very bad idea.

He bought it.

With boss #2, I flattered him by telling him how much I liked working for him (he was brilliant) and I may have lied and said I had a boyfriend.

Was this brave? Of course not.  Just simple gut instinct that if I didn’t make a big fuss, they’d stop.  It didn’t occur to me that they might victimize someone else or that this could be a pattern; I only wanted them to leave me alone.

My questions are these:  Does every proposition by a person in authority qualify as sexual harassment? And has it become too easy to assign blame without also considering ways in which the other party might respond?

I get that a powerful person like Weinstein can intimidate the hell out of a young woman whose career might never get off the ground if she doesn’t “go along”.  But showing up at the guy’s hotel room might send the wrong signal.  And if he answers that door in his bathrobe, why in hell does she go in? Is she that naive? Or is she a participant in a quid pro quo?

I don’t mean to diminish the seriousness of sexual harassment. Men who think “grabbing pussy” is a compliment, or feel entitled to treat women as objects, are disgusting. On the other hand, I wonder whether we’ve gone too far in the other direction, labeling every advance or teasing remark as harassment, which minimizes those that are.

Perhaps we should learn how to diffuse a tense situation before it gets out of control. Plus karate, in case that doesn’t work.

What are your thoughts?

UPDATE, 1/11/18: Interesting perspective from Catherine Deneuve, et. al., saying that the pendulum has swung too far in the other direction (if you’ll forgive the anatomy reference):  https://www.nytimes.com/2018/01/09/movies/catherine-deneuve-and-others-denounce-the-metoo-movement.html?smprod=nytcore-ipad&smid=nytcore-ipad-share

In an open letter published in Le Monde, the actress and dozens of other Frenchwomen criticized the movement for punishing undeserving men.

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Sicily, Part 5 (Ciao! We’ll Be Back!)

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Day 14-15

Since we have the parking garage from hell and are afraid that if we venture out of Taormina we’ll never get back in it,  we revise our plans to explore outside the city. No Noto… we’ll just have to come back to Sicily.

Getting to street level is a challenge (up/down many stairs, across hallways, a gate which inexplicably has the name Condominio San Giorgio on it) but we are intrepid. Or perhaps just desperate to get outside.

Highlights of these two days are buying fresh fish and veggies at the local market for dinner at home, the famous Greek amphitheater which is actually Roman, a lovely little park which is a calm oasis in the middle of this busy city (with interesting topiary, e.g. a reindeer – ? – ), shopping for some ceramics, lunching on fabulous squid/cuttlefish ink pasta, and the discovery of “brutti ma buoni” (ugly but good) cookies.

 

 

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A perfect rainbow for our last day

Day 16-17

Leaving Taormina Lux Apartments is almost as complicated. First we have to get all our stuff to the parking garage.  Then we open the security gate and DH drives outside.  Now I have to run BACK upstairs to the condo, leave the keys on the washing machine, go back down to the basement, and exit a side door because the automatic gate has closed.

Would it not be simpler for each unit to have its own number, which would also be on the keys, which could then be left in a drop box IN the garage? Just sayin’.

We drive back to Palermo and stay in a nice hotel near the airport. Have an excellent lunch, a longish walk, and repack our bags from tomorrow’s flight to Milan.

 

Day 18

We fly to Milan and check in at the Principe di Savoia, where we stayed when we were newly engaged. It’s now part of the Dorchester Group and not quite as special as it used to be but still very nice.

After checking in, we take their complimentary shuttle into town, do some errands (I need another hole punched in my new Hermès belt — even with wine, pasta and pastry I have still lost weight on this trip, woo hoo!) and explore the Museo Bagatti Valsecchi, a house shared by two very rich, very eccentric brothers and crammed with Renaissance tchotchkes and lugubrious religious artifacts.

Our favorite thing is the bathtub, which looks like a baptismal font but had hot and cold running water — the latest thing in the 19th century.

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There’s also a wonderful temporary exhibit of Jacques Henri Lartigue photos.

Returning to the hotel, we meet up with two delightful women before having dinner at Michelin-starred Acanto.

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“Deconstructed” (how I hate that word) cacio e pepe. Delish but prefer the classic version.

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After-dinner macarons and chocolates presented in this charming box.

Day 18

Fly home.  Why can’t our airports feature gelato and other treats like those in Italy?IMG-3193.JPGIMG-3214.JPGIMG-3215.JPG

Happily, all goes smoothly, the bags arrive quickly, and we immediately start planning our next trip.