My Bitter Life of Crime

Very funny; thought you’d enjoy it (but not too much)!

Ben's Bitter Blog

The crime lord.

You would think that a guy that sits on the couch as much as I do, wouldn’t attract the law as much as I do.

You would think that a guy that drives like an old grandma that can barely see over her steering wheel, wouldn’t have as many speeding tickets as I do.

My life of crime started innocently enough. I was pulled over for the first time by a cop probably before most of you people ever even got a driver’s license.

I was 14 years old, living large in my grey Chevy Citation (ironic name considering what is coming next) and my parents let me drive without them for the first time. My friend and I went to a movie and decided to go the “strip” afterwards. I think that is what they called it, but it was essentially the place where all the…

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2 thoughts on “My Bitter Life of Crime

  1. Laura Schulman

    Lol, that’s how I’ve been feeling–got a “speeding” ticket for going 35 in 25 zone. The signs changed back and forth constantly in that neighborhood–a trap if ever I saw one.


  2. adguru101 Post author

    Isn’t that annoying!! My worst speed trap experience was taking my daughter to college in Vermont her freshman year where there was about a 20 yard speed trap as you got close to town with no warning signs. The cops just waited on the line for the out-of-towners to cross it (at about 10 mi over the new speed limit) and give us/me a big fat ticket. SO AGGRAVATING!



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